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Saturday, October 28, 2006
Ramadan...Eid...JAIL?!I have managed to live 37 years in the United States without ever being arrested, hauled away in a police car, or detained
by authorities for any reason. In Kuwait I managed to make it all the way through Ramadan without smoking during the
daylight hours in public, eating, drinking, or doing anything that could be considered a "crime" or offensive to
anyone of this culture. Unfortunately, the first night of Eid (the 4 day celebration that takes place after Ramadan)
was a little different for me... "Couple caught kissing: Police have arrested a couple — a bedoun youth
and an American girl — for committing an immoral act in public, reports Al-Watan daily. The couple was caught kissing
inside a car which was parked on the right shoulder on the Sixth Ring Road adjacent to a bridge in Salmi. The lovers were
caught by a police patrol at an early hour in the morning."
My issues with this? I wasn't
"arrested" Kissing a man on the cheek is "immoral"? Why is it that
it's so acceptable for men to hug and kiss one another like they're in love, but a woman kissing a man on the cheek
inside of a car (not in the open mall or anything) is a crime? How can people drive like maniacs with small
children in their lap while running the police off the road be perfectly normal, but a KISS is a crime?!
I
used to say there was no real "right or wrong" in this world. Everything was just "different" and it wasn't
our place to judge. Well, when my kiss ends up in the same section with a man who rapes his two daughters repeatedly while
giving them drugs -- I know something in this little land is terribly wrong.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Still Ramadan'ingSix days to go. Wow...wow. The Muslims say time flies during Ramadan and I feel like we're in year number 2! As every
day passes I find I am learning so much about this religion, the people who believe it, the ones who pretend they do, and
well...me.
First of all, I might have already mentioned that if I am caught smoking, eating, or drinking in public during Ramadan
I will be held until 8pm in a Kuwaiti Police Station and charged a 100kd fine ($345). However, I am more than welcome to race
down the Sixth Ring at 180km with a small child sitting in my lap while not wearing a seatbelt, and passing every police officer
as I go....I just can't do this with a cigarette in my mouth. THEN we encounter a problem.
I have no doubt there's something about that frame of mind that makes sense; fortunately I have yet to find it.
Personally, I snuck a banana and some juice once. Eh, I have only left the "American area" one time since Ramadan began.
I knew if there was going to be anyone screwing up out there it was going to be me. So, the one time I do manage to find my
way into town during Ramadan I was suddenly desperate for a cigarette, starving, and nearly dying of thirst. This all happened
within 5 minutes of being in public of course. So, I smoked, shoved a banana down my throat, and managed to sip some really
horrible "juice." I was certain there was an APB issued, but I did make it back safely and without incident.
I now only travel out into town after dark (though I am still not sure of the exact time I can smoke), and I don't even
risk it during the day. I mean, I really do have a great respect for this country and the religion, so it's best if I stay
hidden during the daylight hours.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
So bayshant and don't yellow...It really does have a meaning.
Middle Eastern calm. No matter what I say or do it's always acceptable, never judged, and the love still exists. I have
never known people like this before. Never.
Everyday I try to take a few minutes to myself, just enough time to think, meditate, and focus. Here it's as if they're
in a forever state of meditation. Always so focused. Knowing the difference between what is big and what isn't. What is important,
and what really makes no difference in our life. I envy this self awareness, and the deep insight into other people.
In their eyes, we never really make a mistake, we just fail to focus.
Saturday, October 7, 2006
"Small minded, stupid, childlike woman"And they're serious.
The root of every problem in the Middle East is defined above.
Women are strong, brilliant, powerful, and the bearer of our future. We're the ones who love with our hearts, think with
our minds, and live from our souls. We're intelligent, caring, thoughtful, and empathetic. However, in Kuwait we're simply
"small minded, stupid, and childlike."
I suppose that's better than being arrogant, immature, and lacking any work ethic, or values.
Women will one day rule the world, and all will be peaceful. Insha' Allah.
Wednesday, October 4, 2006
Learning Arabic?Desperately trying.
I decided when I returned to the Middle East this time that I was going to take advantage of this opportunity and learn
to speak Arabic. I have given myself until January to speak it fluently enough to have semi conversations and understand most
of what is said around me. So far...well, I don't see it happening. I have dedicated myself to learning a new word a day,
or understanding a new phrase. Considering the boyfriend's native language is Arabic you would think we would invest more
time in teaching me, however it all seems to make more sense when he speaks English.
Arabic is one of the most beautiful languages I have ever heard spoken, but only when a man is speaking to a woman.
To hear men speak to men sounds almost violent, and literally scares me to the point of having to cover my ears if they are
yelling at one another. And they yell a lot, but not out of anger. Unfortunately, Arabic is also one of the most difficult
languages to learn, especially if you're not able to make the "ach" and "ack" sounds, which I have a hard time with.
For now I will continue to practice, use the couple of dozen words and phrases I do know, and enjoy listening to it all
around me.
Being in a country where English is not spoken by all has been one of the most humbling experiences of my life. Suddenly
I am the minority, struggling to adapt in their world. I couldn't love life or this challenge more.
Tuesday, October 3, 2006
America in Kuwait!The beach...
There are very few things the United States and Kuwait share in common...other than me of course. But one thing that
never changes, no matter where you are in the world, is the beach.
Last night we went to the beach. It was late, the weather was perfect, and the beach was just like America. The sand
wasn't like the dirty sand of the desert, but more like the soft silky sand bordering the Atlantic Ocean. The Persian Gulf
was warm, much warmer than our oceans even in the middle of summer.
There was a cat -- I got to touch her and even pick her up. When we called her to follow us onto the beach she did so
willingly. She stayed with us most of them time, running through the sand as if she were so happy. And when it was time to
leave she sat in the sand behind us as if she knew she wasn't going.
The sand, the gulf, the sound of the flowing water, and the cat made it all feel so much like home. My home. The fact
that my dishdasha wearing boyfriend was with me, being so kind and sweet as always... made me feel at home.
Life isn't about where we are in the world, it's about who we are in the world. We can choose to live in a sheltered
box, condemning and judging everyone and everything around us. Or we can get out of that box and embrace the world and all
of its gifts.
Our attitude determines our destiny.
I will find happiness in every day. Insha'Allah.
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